I still remember

I took the entire day off and I kept my mom company at the hospital. It was so refreshing to spend the entire day with her. We watched tv and talked. I remember the entire day. I felt blessed to be able to spend quality time with her. In my eyes she was well, I had faith that everything would be ok and years from now we would be able to look back on all of this. Even though she is not here I still have faith in God, I know I may not be able to understand His reason but I know she is at peace. I just wish I would have asked her more profound questions but I was afraid and I didn't want to think of losing her. I haven't loss her I still have her she is with me everyday and once in a while she pops into my dreams and blesses me with her presence. Oh how I miss her so much! Many people who I speak to tell me how great of a person my mom was and I'm truly honored to have had a great mom. You know what the good thing about it is? Their not just saying it because she passed away, she was TRULY a great person. She did things for others unselfishly, she did it out of her great big heart and never expected anything in return. My friends remind me of how great she was also, when I was younger our house was the "go to house" she would cook for us and make everyone feel at home, she helped people who were in need of a hand. I'm truly blessed to have had a mom who thought of everyone. I hope that I can live up to how great she was. This all happen so fast and oh way too soon. As each day goes by I'm reminded how painful this is and that time doesn't make a difference, it gets worse. And as each day goes by I yawn for her even more. How I wish this was a nightmare and I could wake up and hug her. I want to go back to the very beginning of this journey and treasure every moment.